The Magic Ratio of Business Relationships by Kevin Dwinnell

Psychologist John Gottman explored positive-to-negative ratios in marriages and defined the magic ratio of 5:1.  By scoring positive and negative interactions in one 15-minute conversation between newlyweds, Gottman and his team of researchers discovered that they had predicted divorce with 94 percent accuracy.

Five positive interactions for every negative one.

If you’ve done any business training on troubleshooting or problem solving, you’ll find that the methods used for creating a positive relationship within the business world are no different than those used in the personal world.  To look at Gottman’s data, you need to show your clients, customers and business partners five positive experiences to every negative one.  (Remember, we’re talking relationships here, not product quality.)

That’s a lot of interaction, and that’s the appeal of social media.  The potential is there for more frequent interactions because you’re not waiting for your customer to come to your site, you’re meeting them at theirs. And it’s an interaction, whereas your normal marketing message is an impression or a spot.  It’s a pitch and not an engagement.

So, my self serving question is, what other tools are available that can give you the frequency you need to ensure your getting the volume of interactions you need to build that positive relationship?  Yes, I think we have a good one and I know there are others whether you use KickApps or an iPhone app.

What are your favorites?

Posted in Commentary | Tags: business, John Gottman, Marketing and Advertising, Persuasion, Ratio, Relationships, Social media | No Comments »

Red States and Blue States – Get the Most from the Contrasting Views of Business and Development by Kevin Dwinnell

We just went through a period of disagreement here at Brand Thunder – the classic and clashing viewpoints of the suits and the geeks. I think it ended well, but if this is my last post due to a malicious crashing of my computer, I’ll reconsider.

When your business is evolving this rapidly and timeframes are perpetually short, it’s already an intense environment. Mix in a bunch of strong personalities on a hot topic and you’re bound to have differences of opinion. Ideally, it’s during these times that a fledgling idea can be sculpted into something meaningful. Or, the process can disintegrate and lead to a lot of hurt feelings.

How do you get one result instead of the other? And how do you foster the type of discussion that is challenging, but creates the better end result? We asked the Brand Thunder corporate counselor and received the following advice:

Revisit Covey’s Seven Habits – #5 – Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

This concept has been well known to business people for years, but now, much research has validated its power. It’s the crucial technique that will enhance your team’s functioning. (And by the way, it’s not just for the business setting—it’s a great tool in any relationship.)

If the concept is a little too vague, here are some specific recommendations to follow when you find yourself in a group with differences of opinion:

1. Give each side uninterrupted time to define their position.
2. Before the other side speaks, reiterate what the first party said to confirm it’s understood – and ask if it’s correct “What I hear you saying is…”
3. It may help to whiteboard it. Bulleting the key ideas and positions on a topic. provides a visual reminder of the discussion and viewpoints.
4. Then move on to collaboration or decision-making.

Keep in mind, understanding does not equal agreement. Nor does understanding mean there will be a change in course or decision. What it does mean is that each side will know they had a chance to have their opinion expressed and understood. Everyone wants to feel that their opinion matters to others.

In the end, you’ll not only have a functional team. You’ll have a better one.

Posted in Commentary | Tags: brand thunder, Branded Browser, business, custom browser, Marketing and Advertising, Relationships, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People | No Comments »